Sex on a First Date?

The age-old question; is it ok to sleep with someone on your first date? Attitudes towards sex and dating have changed completely over the past few years; with apps like tinder making casual hook-ups the norm and the media’s obsession with all things sex, we’re much more comfortable talking about it, and being open about our own experiences.

But is there still a stigma about girls who sleep with guys on a first date? We all still fear the dreaded ‘slag’ comment, and despite our new found openness many of us are still reluctant to reveal our magic number. But if we put those things aside, our worries about what other people might think, is having sex on a first date even a good idea?

YES

It depends what you want, entirely. If you’re not looking for a relationship and just want to have (excuse the phrase) ‘a bit of fun,’ then in theory, why not? If you have an instant connection and sparks are flying all over the shop, then you might just want to skip dinner and take he/she straight back to your beautifully prepared bedroom. And – it’s not unheard of that many a long term relationship has started in this way. If there’s a mutual attraction and respect for each other, then there is no reason why after sleeping with someone on the first date, it couldn’t blossom into a fully-fledged romance.

*Note:* Friends, Ross & Emily and their ‘first date’ weekend in Vermont.

Although to be fair, that didn’t end great...

NO

Many girls and guys would say, ‘if you sleep with a guy on a first date, he won’t respect you.’ There is sometimes truth in that, but if he DOES lose respect for you then it’s hypocritical, it takes two to tango as they say. If there is a lack of respect or an element of judgement from either party, don’t pursue that relationship (casual or serious).

On a lighter note, sometimes it’s just nice to wait. It creates anticipation, and allows you to build up a level of trust meaning that when you do have sex, you'll both feel completely comfortable (and so, probably enjoy it a lot more). It’s the general consensus that Nick and Jess’s eagerly anticipated first kiss was the hottest thing on TV c.2013, aahhh....

REMEMBER

….any decision you make should be without fear of judgement. Once that fear is out the way, you are free to do whatever the hell you want, but above all things (and we hate to put a downer on it), you need to remember your safety. It’s never a good idea to take a completely new person back to your house before you have got to know them. Equally when you do have sex, you put yourself in an incredibly vulnerable position so you need to KNOW that your partner can be trusted.

It’s also important to remember that sex can mean something different to every person. Where someone is able to detach it from emotion, others can’t. So whatever you do, make sure you’re both completely open and honest about what it is you want.

And just because, we'll leave you with these wise words….